It’s so very oppressive, middle class and unnecessarily British when people tell you not to have emotions. “Keep calm and carry on?!”, Not only is this a ridiculous thing to ask of an emotional being, (which we all are as human beings), it can also be extremely damaging.
It has been said to me several times by some other humans whom I admire that one must lean into the struggle.
For so long this seemed impossibly scary to me, however, that is exactly why this idea makes sense; acting through fear of the unknown is a pretty consistently useless way of being which leads to procrastination. So why fear the struggle?! Lean into it! Be it, embody it and express it. These are all ways in which we can process what is happening and move through it.
Instead of cowering at the towering mound of shit that faces us, roll in it, be a dog, eat it, dance it, write it and shout it. SHIT SHIT SHIT, I AM THIS PILE OF SHIT!!! And it will slowly but surely disintegrate and become something else, often revealing a gem in the centre which you can keep to help you in the future.
So with this in mind and the fact that being in Edinburgh has significantly cut my summer short by being a murky grey abyss that is the north north; I have had to find ways of moving through emotions as I can feel depression and flatness trickling it’s way into my loins.
I am moving through this by BEING DRAMATIC!
Being the very drama that my brain invents to smack me to the floor and tell me I’m an eternal fuck up who will never achieve their dreams and die desperately unsatisfied.
I thought I would create a sensory based “BE DRAMATIC!” checklist which we can all use and adapt to our own needs to help us through times of melancholy and deep depression. I have frequently found music, colours, dressing and movement to be highly useful and mostly manageable forms of catharsis in times of need…
1. EAT SOMETHING GREEN! – Broccoli is basically witchcraft! It’s protein, it’s fibre, it’s nutrients! It’s low calorie, it’s high energy, cheaper than a prozac and without the increased risk of suicide and long term liver damage.
2. MATCH THE SKY! – Look like a fucking cloud! BE GREY, BE BLUE, BE STORMY AND THUNDEROUS!! BE SWIRLY AND AGGRESSIVE, BE TORN UP AND FALL OUT OF YOUR OWN ASS WITH YOUR OUTFITS!!
3. LISTEN TO “BOBBY VINTON”! – My particular faves being, “Blue Velvet”, “There, I’ve said it again”, and “Tell me why”. Alternatively you could give Roberta Flack’s version of “Killing me softly” a bash on repeat, or go for something a bit less codependent and a tad more cunty like Lou Reed, Patti Smith or Hole.
4. BE DRAMATIC! – Serve some banshee realness: WAIL, RUN, LIFT WEIGHTS LIKE YOUR ON ROIDS, SCREAM AT THE SKY, SHOUT AT THE SEA, CRY RIVERS, STAMP ON MOUNTAINS, and when your all done sit with an ACTUAL pen and paper and write how fucking dramatic your life is like a teenage girl in heartbreak. I dare you! Overcome that masc mask and do something for YOURSELF!
5. BE SELFISH! – Sometimes you have to be selfish, you have to stop people pleasing and trying to give to others and give to yourself. Depression will rob you of all your vitality and resources, so it’s important to constantly stock up and replenish. It is taking me years to master this part but I am getting better at it each year I experience depression. Eat the foods that are good for YOU! Read the books that are good for YOU! Listen to the people who are good for YOU! And write down how YOU want your life to look! DREAM A DREAM, BE A TRAGEDY, COVER YOUR ROOM IN BRING ME THE HORIZON POSTERS, HAVE 3 BATHS A DAY WITH PATCHOULI CANDLES AND HIMALAYAN ROCK SALT, AND MASTURBATE UNTIL YOUR BITS ARE RED.
All of these things are cathartic and don’t involve DRUGS or ALCOHOL. They will not give you a hangover or a comedown or worsen your situation with mind and mood altering quick fixes.
The worst thing that can happen is that you gave it a go.
It is not foolproof and sometimes we can’t get out of bed, but when we can this is what has reduced the risk of bed paralysis for me.
So why not try it?!
Lean into the struggle and BE DRAMATIC!
Written and Recommended by Ted Rogers “Artpornblog”
All written material is copyright of Ted Rogers “Artpornblog”.