SEX TOY PORN: [CUSTARD]

a65dam

SEXY SECRETS

When your looking for discreet or interesting things to put your dick in.

Try Custard!

Many of us know what it’s like to grow up in a sexually limited environment. Sex is deemed as naughty, bad or too adult growing up and we are burdened with the guilt and shame that comes with our sexual thoughts or desires. We could be told off for having a walk, especially if it’s over a man.

So it may not be suitable to have your cupboard stacked full of dildo’s for your mum to find when she’s dusting. (Even though you asked her not to go into your room!!!)

Potted custard is a creamy, thick, shiny, smooth substance that tastes great too! If you leave it to reach room temperature before use then you reduce the risk of getting a cold willy as you thrust away at it’s appetising pool.

Make sure you wash yourself properly afterwards, otherwise you run the risk of your penis smelling like sour milk, (which is NOT COOL!).

And if you so fancy you can even eat the custard then bin the pot! Any sexy evidence is gone in a flash. And if your mum finds an empty pot of custard in the bin it won’t even be questioned.

Now remember that custard is not as good for the belly as it is for your bits. It is extremely fatty and calorific so it may be best to wash it down the sink if you wish to remain trim. However, for all you bunkers out there, eat away!

So remember, if you are looking for a DIY sexy alternative to actually going and buying sex toys, Custard is where it’s at.

Go on, give it a go, it’s a creamy delight!

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Written and Recommended by Ted Rogers “Artpornblog”

xXx

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