As a young gay man, when I was in the closet I was always looking for stuff to put my dick in. I mean I’m still looking now but I have a slightly more expansive knowledge as to what is available.

If you can’t find a human you can always use the nearest equivalent which tends to be a Fleshjack. Something which I have not yet tried as I tend to play the Fleshjack’s role.

However, I was not always aware of the existence of the Fleshjack and creativity often had to come into play.

There seemed to me many options in my sexually driven mind including food stuffs such as pots of custard and Jam Donuts, these however, were somewhat sticky and just didn’t satisfy.

But what intrigued me most of all was the “Water Snake”.

Ever present in the 90’s and naughties in gift shops on school trips and in friends draws were these objects of desire. Rubbery, slippery, brightly coloured and most definitely representing both team train and tunnel.

Never once did it serve as an object of education or a mindless plaything without the connotation of something sexual. Like obvious fruit and vegetables the “Water Snake” is mostly definitely the perfect substitute sex toy before one is brave enough to venture into a sex shop.

Please take caution however as water snakes may not be 100% hypoallergenic and they have a tendency to burst and cause much distress. Although this bursting could serve as a quick thrill for some.

Further to this, some water snakes come with fish, spiders or other objects floating around in them. This again could be seen as a positive or a negative. I personally would not want to be anywhere near a spider and especially not have them anywhere near my dick whether they are plastic or not.

Overall, I would most definitely recommend giving it a go. Why not? If you are not aware of the Fleshjack or cannot afford one then the Water Snake is the way Forward.

I would love to know your thoughts and any experiences with Water Snakes or other sex toy substitutes.

Ted Xx

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